Cast all your cares and anxieties on him, because He cares for you.
1 Peter 5:7 (This is probably not the exact quotation, I'm rolling only on memory here. I'm not trying to rewrite the Bible, so if you're a theologian--chill out.)
So this week has been an absolute blur for me. It has been fun and exciting. I'm learning so much; its unreal. The real story about this week, aka-the thing the Lord is teaching me, began last week. Last week's rotation was fairly easy. I had great hours and no one made me feel like a complete idiot. BUT I was looking forward to a horrible week with long hours, a presentation to three big dogs, and rounding with them as well. This was so nerve racking to me. I was dreading this week so much. This may sound silly to some of you, but some of you that battle nerves, worry, and public speaking know where I'm coming from. So what did I do? I prayed. I prayed that SOMEHOW I would avoid this certain doctor who was known for "pimping" students, which is also known as putting you on the spot and asking questions. I prayed that he would go on vacation, or get a cold (that's terrible, I know- but David prayed for worse on his enemies, right?), or something else would happen that would allow me to avoid this guy for the week. I was praying for a miracle. This guy doesn't vacation and I'm pretty sure he has never been sick a day in his life. Superman.
Monday rolls around... I wake up at 640... I'm supposed to be there at 630. What a way to make a first impression right? So I rush to the hospital. I'm in there with the team by 705. It goes unnoticed. We are walking into the first surgery and the OR next to us needs an extra set of hands... I get sent in.
The doctor is from the area I grew up. We hit it off, talked about the home place. I'm relaxed and excited to be there. He starts asking questions in a non-pimpatory style, and because of his style I can confidently answer without nervousness. He also just happened to ask questions about a subject matter I just happened to read about in the few days before. Needless to say, I made a great impression and the resident asked me to leave my cell and pager number. After the surgery, I went meet back up with my team and the day ended early. Dr. Superman was never encountered. I went home super excited, yet still dreading the next day.
That night when I'm getting in bed, I notice I have a few messages and a missed call. I read the text messages and I couldn't believe it. It was the resident from the surgery that morning. I had been removed from the service I was on and was placed on their team! It was such a blessing! I immediately felt relief.
I know without a doubt that all of these things didn't just happen by coincidence. What are the odds that I got pulled from the OR I was in to go operate with the other team, AND the doctor happened to be from near my hometown, AND he just happened to ask questions about something I had recently studied, AND he needed enough help this week to justify pulling me off of another service? That, my friends, is not coincidence. That is answered prayer.
The lesson of my story this week: It doesn't matter if its big or small, God cares if I do. He looks out for his children and he desires the best for me. I prayed for favor in the eyes of my superiors, and he gave it. I prayed for avoidance of Dr. Superman, and he removed that obstacle from me. God is good. He is faithful. He shows himself to us everyday if we take the time to look for it. What all have I been missing simply because I have not been looking?
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
Taking pride
Today was my last day of Gyn/Oncology. It was a tough first week to have, but I made it.
On our last round today, I was leaning against a wall waiting to move on to the next patient and across the hall there was an empty room. I was gazing off into space and thinking about how tired I was. I'm not usually the most observant person, which is why I think God chose to open my eyes and teach me a lesson. In that empty room, I noticed that there was a folded towel on the bed tray and the hand towels were arranged like they do in a hotel with one wrapped around the bottom of the other one which is fanned out on the top (I know that is a terrible description but if you have stayed in a hotel, you know what I mean). When I saw this, it struck me. I was touched that housekeeping went so far that they would spend that much time just to make the room a little more presentable, even though it might go unnoticed.
Today I learned that we all should not look at our job as a JOB. We should look at it as a chance to make this world better. We should take pride in what we do, whether we are the doctors taking care of sick women with cancer or the housekeeping staff that are taking care of her. It takes the entire team to heal these people. It takes doctors, nurses, pharmacists, lab techs, housekeeping, maintenance workers, computer engineers, researchers, secretaries, administrators, nutritionists, and cafeteria chefs. The doctors can't cook the food, the maintenance man can't start the IVs, and the nurses can't clean the rooms. It takes each one to complete the team. No one is more important than the other.
No matter how tired I am, I must press on. I must look at my to-do list as opportunity, not obligations. Each interaction with patients and with staff is an opportunity to shine the light of Christ. I pray that those I work with and those I treat can see Christ's love in me.
On our last round today, I was leaning against a wall waiting to move on to the next patient and across the hall there was an empty room. I was gazing off into space and thinking about how tired I was. I'm not usually the most observant person, which is why I think God chose to open my eyes and teach me a lesson. In that empty room, I noticed that there was a folded towel on the bed tray and the hand towels were arranged like they do in a hotel with one wrapped around the bottom of the other one which is fanned out on the top (I know that is a terrible description but if you have stayed in a hotel, you know what I mean). When I saw this, it struck me. I was touched that housekeeping went so far that they would spend that much time just to make the room a little more presentable, even though it might go unnoticed.
Today I learned that we all should not look at our job as a JOB. We should look at it as a chance to make this world better. We should take pride in what we do, whether we are the doctors taking care of sick women with cancer or the housekeeping staff that are taking care of her. It takes the entire team to heal these people. It takes doctors, nurses, pharmacists, lab techs, housekeeping, maintenance workers, computer engineers, researchers, secretaries, administrators, nutritionists, and cafeteria chefs. The doctors can't cook the food, the maintenance man can't start the IVs, and the nurses can't clean the rooms. It takes each one to complete the team. No one is more important than the other.
No matter how tired I am, I must press on. I must look at my to-do list as opportunity, not obligations. Each interaction with patients and with staff is an opportunity to shine the light of Christ. I pray that those I work with and those I treat can see Christ's love in me.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
the REAL deal.
Today was my first full day of clinical rotations. I put in 12 1/2 hours. I am clueless and awkward... but its so awesome. I have learned so much in such a short time, and little is medical. Most of it is just human reactions and interactions...
At the end of the day, we were standing around our resident, just talking about how things work with our clinical years and what to expect and how to get the most out of it. He said something that really hit me. "This is the culmination of your first two years of school. You know that patient you saw today and wrote about in that chart? She has a family. Its the same family that we walked by in the hall. The family we gave hope to. That is no simulation. That is real."
Its so amazing to think that I learned all those things in the first two years, but they help me so little now. They never taught me how to give hope to a worried husband or to comfort a dying young woman or encourage a little boy before he gets a shot. They didn't teach me the bedside manner. That is what this is about. You train to become a physician, but you learn to be a doctor. This is not a simulation. This is not a multiple choice question. This is not a test. This. is. real.
At the end of the day, we were standing around our resident, just talking about how things work with our clinical years and what to expect and how to get the most out of it. He said something that really hit me. "This is the culmination of your first two years of school. You know that patient you saw today and wrote about in that chart? She has a family. Its the same family that we walked by in the hall. The family we gave hope to. That is no simulation. That is real."
Its so amazing to think that I learned all those things in the first two years, but they help me so little now. They never taught me how to give hope to a worried husband or to comfort a dying young woman or encourage a little boy before he gets a shot. They didn't teach me the bedside manner. That is what this is about. You train to become a physician, but you learn to be a doctor. This is not a simulation. This is not a multiple choice question. This is not a test. This. is. real.
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